I guess I'm good at creating problems; or seeing those that actually don't exist. My current problem involves giving gifts.
I love to please others, by giving them gifts. I love to see them happy.
But when it comes to certain people... it sometimes feels like I simply can't do anything right. I know they want me to become happy as well; I'm getting a lot of gifts.
The thing is, I don't always show how happy I am with things. At least, not in their eyes.
Each person that visits my house gets a tour of things I've gotten from the USA. They have to see everything! I'm so happy with them!
But... the person who send that gift... doesn't see that. He thinks I'm not happy at all with them. He thinks he doesn't amase me at all. But he does.
And when it comes to me giving gifts... half of the time I get to hear: "It's cool... but..." And there comes more then. "It brings bad luck." or "We already have so many of them." or, many many more things that gives me the feeling that they do like it... but rather would have gotten something else.
Funny. They always love the candy. The cheapest and easiest gift. And that they love.
But the thing that took me most of my time and money? They always say they like it, followed by a but.
It makes me wonder... maybe I should stop sending gifts. I don't know if I can handle one more but. I know they mean well, and that they don't want to hurt me...
It's the thought that counts. Yes, I know.
But why bothering sending anything again, if I'll just hear again: "It's cool, but..."
I know my friends don't want to hurt me. And in fact, it's only 2 people who do that. And I don't think they even know that they are doing that.
If they read this, I'll probably throw them into depression. Yay for me. Another person sucked along in my own petty depression.
I bet they now think I'm ungrateful, but I still have all the gifts I ever got, on my room, or in the living room's showcase. I honestly love my gifts. I just don't always show it to the givers, because they are not here...