What is it, national telephone telemarketing night?!

Call 1:

Lady: Hello, with blabla from blabla. I assume I'm speaking with the wife of Mr. Ocean?
Me: ...I sincerely hope not!
Lady: Huh?
Me: Because that would mean I would be married to my dad!

Hello?! What the heck happened to:

Lady: Am I speaking to Ms. Ocean?
Me: Which one?
Lady: J. Ocean
Me: ...That's my dad....

So from confusing my dad with the wrong gender they suddenly make assumptions. Hello??! What the heck is going on?! Rule number 1: NEVER make assumptions. That's just common sense!

And, the next one (5 minutes later!! seriously!):

Lady: Hello, with blablatoofastformetohear from toofasttorecogniseaswell, I assume you are below the age of 69?
Me:... Yes... and what is that for a question?!
Lady: *high speed* We are doing a survey *couldn't hear of what* from resident doctors *again going too fast* and we would like to send you a folder free of charge, can we send you that?
Me: No, not when it goes like this.
Lady: But it's free of charge!
Me: Not when it's practically shoved into my face, I--
Lady: *interrupting; said in one breath* I do apologise for that *going too fast again* but can I still send you the folder?
Me: No, not when it--
Lady: *interrupting again; said in one breath* Then I wish you a pleasant evening bye.

About 75 rules of etiquette were broken in this one conversation! Target anyone?! Wanting to go home or so?! Even though I'm not an outbound telephone person (helpdesk; that's inbound, people call me and I assist them), even we have the '10 golden rules of telemarketing' on our screen.
I should have kept that twit on the phone and demanded she would let me finish my words. Impolite brat.